Episode 13: A Lesson on Vulnerability

Today’s episode of the podcast is about A Lesson on Vulnerability and how vulnerability plays an important part in our healing process

KEY TAKEAWAYS COVERED IN THE PODCAST

• Healing can make us vulnerable, we can become open to talking about it.

• The more we can talk about it, the more we can touch people.

• Asking for help is key.

• Talking about our experience is part of healing, it triggers hope for everyone.

• Have faith in yourself, and believe things are happening for you.

• Being vulnerable makes us open to receiving feedback and insight.

• Letting people in makes it easier.

• Through this pain, we are able to come through with the love and support for ourselves and others.

HIGHLIGHTS YOU CAN'T SIMPLY MISS 

• The more we can talk about it, the more we can touch people 04:20

• A lot of us suffered in silence and don't talk about it 05:26

• Asking for help is key 06:45

• Talking about our experience is also part of the healing 06:48

• A lot of times we want to see the proof 09:10

• You will get through this, you will be able to come out of this 10:30

• We need to open up our perspective and our vision and our possibilities and scope 11:10

• Sometimes all we need is a positive word 14:25

• Be open to your own vulnerablility and let people in 15:15

• Through this pain that we're able to come through it with grace 17:06

• We're able to come through it with love and support for ourselves and for others 17:12

• There's a genuine help 17:50

More episodes: https://www.alopeciaangel.com/podcast-all-episodes 

Transcription

Awaken to hair growth. Awaken to hair growth because there is, possibility to get your hair back. Awaken to hair growth because we're not told that we're able to conquer and overcome alopecia. Awaken to hair growth because I want to be a positive light and beacon for you because I've healed my alopecia and now I help others do the same with different types of alopecia, men, women, children, of all ages of all races and ethnicities.

Welcome back to the alopecia angel podcast. I'm your host, Johanna. I hope everyone is having a wonderful day. It is finally sunny here and it's great to see the sunshine through my window.

Today I wanted to talk about talking about alopecia, opening up that conversation and being vulnerable. You know, during my time with alopecia, it was actually very embarrassing. I didn't tell my friends, not even my closest friends. I barely told my family once and it was actually a conversation that we kind of only had once.

And that was it. It was something that, it was a touchy subject. No one really wanted to talk about, and really no one asked me about. I had shown them once my little bald spot that I had, which since then, you know, had grown into something bigger and bigger, and then the eyelashes and the receding hairline and all these other things happened.

And it got to the point where I just suffered in silence. It got to the point where I didn't want to talk about it. I didn't want anyone to know and I was really hiding. I was hiding from everyone, hiding from myself, hiding from others and you know, I just tried to play it off. Like no big deal, nothing's happening, nothing here, nothing to see, type thing.

And I don't know if that helped me or not. I think sometimes it does in a way, but it was also what I was feeling. And I understand if that's what you're going through. I know many clients have limited their activities. They don't like to go swimming anymore. They don't like to, or even let's say the children or the families, they don't like to let's say, play on the monkey bars anymore or maybe bike ride or do anything that would cause their ponytail or their hair to flip and to uncover or show the bald spots. 

So, you know, swimming, for example, would be out of the question, um, hanging upside down from monkey bars or even dating, you know, there's certain activities that inhibit you to do with less confidence because you have alopecia and I have another client who, she's a school teacher and she didn't want to teach her class while having alopecia. She wanted to have this heal as soon as possible before her class started in the fall so that they wouldn't notice. So that they wouldn’t tease her, right?

Because kids can be mean and cruel and say mean things and this type of thing and so she didn't want to expose herself to this. And during the time of my alopecia, as I just said, I was embarrassed, I was struggling through all these things. But at the same time, when I started healing, I almost became chipper about it and which was, which sounds really odd, I know. But I became really excited because I knew I was healing.

I knew hair was coming and I knew I was seeing the hair growth and the changes in my body. I felt the changes in, you know, the clarity of my thinking, the brain fog had vanished and there was a lot of things that were moving that allowed me to know and think and believe that I was healing. And so with that surge of confidence, with that surge of, of hopefulness of like, yes, I have my golden ticket, I became more vulnerable.

I became more open to talking about it and I started talking to it, to anybody and everybody who would listen. And, um, I'm sure I bothered my husband a lot because I talk about it like a parent. I talk about it to everybody. We could be on the street at the supermarket and it comes up, it comes up with everything.

And the more I’ve spoken about it, the more I realized that it touches more and more people. And I think the estimates that you find online about, oh, alopecia, you know, targets so many million people in the US, in the UK and in Canada. I think those numbers are off immensely because I have found random people, friends, family, neighbors, people at the post office, people at restaurants, people at the hair salon, people anywhere in everywhere.

Even my Uber drivers, people anywhere in everywhere who have been affected by alopecia, who knows somebody with alopecia who have experienced alopecia and I even have a client who, she comes from a really, really small town. And there's only one school so this is how small her town is that there's only one school there.

And in the same school, there's three people with alopecia and she tells me, how is this possible? You know, is this autoimmune disease situation, like more of a pandemic than they we're like really understanding and at the same time, I think it is but a lot of times we suffer in silence. A lot of times we don't talk about it and maybe parents do because parents want to see if other parents have seen it.

You know, it's kind of like, I remember when I got lice, when I was in first grade, there was a little girl who gave the whole school lice. She was new to the school and she was the one who brought it to everybody. It was quite surprising how this happened, right? You know, one day you're in school, the next day you come home with lice and everyone has it, and everyone is staying home because they have these little eggs harvested in, in their scalp.

And I remember the day, like it was yesterday with that really thick, strong metal pick that my mom had to use to pick out all these eggs so that they wouldn't keep hatching. And it's something like that, it's something that just, like happens like wildfire. When we start talking about our problems, there's always someone there potentially who knows somebody who's been there, done that, or who can help you, or maybe knows somebody who does.

And it's quite interesting, I think females as females, we tend to do this more. I'm not sure about men, but as females, we talk about our problems or situations or kids, what happens and how we can help this certain and we also ask for help, which is great in many ways, because asking for help is key.

And I think talking about our experience is also part of the healing. Talking about our experience is also part of the healing in terms of, A.) not feeling alone, B.) not feeling isolated from the rest of the community. And then when you hear of a happy ending, when you hear of someone who's healed it and who's reversed it, doesn't that ignite hope for you.

Doesn't that ignite, you know, something, doesn't that trigger you in a way where you're like, geez, that could be me. Jeez. What did she do? Geez, isn't this possible for me? Because it is possible for you because it is possible for everyone, for our children who are going through alopecia for, you know, your loved ones, whether that's your sister or your brother or your family friend, it is possible.

And It's as possible, as much as you want it to be possible, you know, and just like it's possible for everyone to achieve whatever it is that they want to achieve. It wasn't Napoleon hill, I believe who said, if the mind can conceive it, we can achieve it. And it's the same positive affirmations, the same positive quotes that I lean on.

When I personally feel like I'm up against a wall. When I personally feel that there's a black cloud or a gray cloud over me and, you know, I want out, or I want to break through and break free from a situation, whether it's alopecia or something else. And, you know, using my grandma's advice, there's only two things that really are mandatory in life.

Taxes and death, those are the only two things that happen to everybody. So thankfully, we're not going to die from alopecia. Thankfully there is, alternative options and more than likely someone needs to hear that it's possible for them to heal. I can't begin to say how many people who've come to me and they tell me that they've been struggling for years and for decades.

For decades, that's 20 years, 30 years, 40 years, 50 years and they've been searching and searching and searching for a solution for an alternative solution for a healthy, viable solution. And a lot of times seen as believing. A lot of times we want to see the proof, we want to see that it's possible but before we went to the moon, we are already made it our goal to get to the moon, right?

That happened in 1969 when the first man touched the moon, stepped on the moon, planted the American flag and came back to earth. Does all right, did that and before buzz even existed, I'm sure that that thought, that idea, that goal to be the first country to the moon was so important. It was a race, it really was. And the mind conceived it and the man achieved it and they were able to do it. You know, this team of astronauts, this team and NASA, they were able to do it. And with years of experimentation, with years of trial and error, they made it happen.

So out their capabilities and their possibilities. This is what mind boggles me. I don't know about you, but for me, I always knew deep down, there was an inner voice that said you will heal from this. You will get through this, you will be able to come out of this, I didn't know how long it would take.

I didn't know what that struggle or the obstacles would look like. I didn't know many times what the next step was even, and that's just it, right? What do they say? Leap and the net appears, it's having faith. A lot of times it's having faith, having faith that you can do this, having faith that you can find a way, having faith that the universe is working for you, that things are happening for you.

And sometimes we just need to take off those blinders. Sometimes we need to open up our perspective and our vision and our possibilities and scope and say, yeah, if she can do it, I can do it. This is what the beautiful thing is of reading biographies. I don't know how many of you read biographies or like biographies.

I've always been interested by biographies. I've always been entranced by what people have accomplished hundreds of years ago, thousands of years ago, you know, even 20 years ago or 50 years ago and what they've been able to accomplish and their start and their beginning and how they got there, how they became who they were in history.

And a lot of times. Yes, it's opportunities. Sometimes it's a chance. Sometimes it's preparation, many times it's a combination of all three and many times it's Locke and other times it's they were determined. I was listening to an audio book the other day, and they were saying that this inventor had tried over 10,000 different inventions before he created this one invention, who put them on the map.

And this is amazing because how many of you are as willing or as determined to do something over 10,000 different times to finally achieve your goal, to finally achieve and cross the finish line, to finally get to where you want to get to. It takes grit, it takes tenacity. There's one thing I am tenacious, that's for sure.

Over three years, day in and day out, day in and day out. And if you need to take a break, you take a break. And if you need just like, a day of rest, then a day of disconnect, do it, but get back on the horse, get back on the horse, have some faith in yourself, have some faith in what's possible for you and keep going.

And like I said, being open to that vulnerability of your situation. There's many times where I remember, and I smile now for those of you watching on YouTube, I smile now because there's times where being vulnerable has allowed me to not just open up, but to receive feedback, to receive insight from those who know me, who care about me, whether that's friends or family, uh, or other loved ones, or even, you know, a close friend or neighbor.

And they've been able to throw in some insight and give ideas. So for example, um, there was a career path that I had a problem with, or not a problem with, but something I was like, chewing on, right? And it was one of those life decisions and I recall I was on, um, I was on this beach with a friend and she and I were talking about this.

And, you know, she gave me the courage. She gave me the oomph. She gave me the motivation, the spark to move forward into this direction to move forward into this choice that I was trying to like, you know, dabble into, into this option of, oh, should I do this? Should I not do this? Should I take this job opportunity? Should I not? What should I do?

And she gave me that encouragement and sometimes that's all we need. Sometimes all we need is a positive word. Sometimes all we need is, you're doing a good job. Keep going, everything's gonna be okay. Everything's gonna get better and it's hard when you don't. And I say this because my road to healing alopecia was very lonely with not so many, uh, you know, words of encouragement.

But definitely a south propelling self-motivating engine. Again, it was just very, very, self-motivating very, very lonely to do it that way. Very, very lonely and tough to do it that way. It messes with your mind. It messes with your emotions and messes with other aspects of your life, you start contemplating, doubting and questioning other areas of your life.

But when you have the blueprint, when you have, you know, that vulnerability and you let people in then it makes it easier, it really does., it makes it easier. So today I encourage you to open up and tell your story. If you want to share your story with me, I would love to hear it. Feel free to email me, feel free to write me a message or DM me. 

I'd love to hear your story because in being vulnerable and sharing our stories we can find answers and we can also help each other. There is a way to heal, I've done it and so have my clients. And so that opportunity is there for you whenever you're ready. But even if you just want to vent, even if you just want to get it off your chest do so. Do so in an email, do so in a DM, do so with a friend, do so with a family member and be vulnerable, but be vulnerable in a safe space, be vulnerable with those who love and support you, truly love and support you because that's important too.

You know, during my darkest times with alopecia, I could only go to my husband. I could really only go to him because he was my sounding board and he was the reality check. He was the reality check when things were getting worse. He was the reality check when things were getting better or when things were stagnant or when there was no hair growth and there was just more hair fall.

He was the only one and suffering in silence again, it's hard. It really is and I know where you're coming from. I know, and my voice just cracked. I'm sorry, it's definitely a painful past, but it's through this pain that we're able to come through it with grace. We're able to come through it with love and support for ourselves and for others.

And it's a place where you don't have to go back to, it's a place where you can learn from, grow and move on. It's a place where it's just a chapter. What I like to say is that it's a bus stop in life and you can stay at that bus stop and leave it. You can stay there if you want by choice, or you can get the next bus to happy land and go away and you can do that.

I know you're suffering, but there's help. There's genuine help. So I'm here to help you whenever you're ready, just to conclude being vulnerable at your time when it's right for you is also part of the healing process, is also part of being understood, being heard, being felt and know that everything will be okay. Everything will be okay and sometimes, you know, some people take longer than others and sometimes some people have extra steps to do. And sometimes, you know, not everyone gets the quick healing like my clients do, but healing is there and it's there and open for everybody.

And sometimes we have to cross bridges that make us uncomfortable. Sometimes we have to cross bridges that make us see something new, make us, enforce us, help us to upgrade our lives. And this is important because without that possibility of upgrades, Then we can't get to the next level, the next level of healing, the next level of healing, the next level of health, the next level of hair I'm sending you all lots of love, big hugs and lots of alopecia support. You got this and I'm here to help. Take care. 

Thank you for listening to the alopecia angel podcast, a positive light and healing alopecia. You can do this and we can help. Spread the word that reversing alopecia is possible by telling your friends and family.