Episode 120 - 5 Clues You Are on the Wrong Path Towards Healing

Hi, everybody, welcome back to the Alopecia Angel podcast, I'm your host, Johanna Dahlman. It's so good to be with you again. I just wanted to give a quick shout out to all the moms who were on the coaching call this past week because all their kids are seeing hair growth and it's amazing, it's astounding and I'm so, so, so excited for all these families because they all deserve it, because they're all doing the work and because they all have results to show for it.

So congratulations to all the moms on that call that we had last week in our coaching program, because this is fantastic news, who doesn't want to see their child heal? Who doesn't want to heal themselves from hair loss? And the thing is, if you have those feelings where you're not in peace, where you're not grounded, where you're not in a position where you're happy with what's going on with your results or what you're doing, then that's a clue. That's a clue to pivot, that's a clue to make changes. These are very, very apparent that I have seen where people have gone wrong and this is a problem for many reasons.

One, because it elongates your journey. So instead of having hair loss, boom, in less than 2 months and getting on the right path, this is actually prolonging your journey. Your situation, the hair loss, the baldness, the trauma that goes along with it, the sadness, the anxiety, the depression, the ancillary symptoms. If there was a way to finish and complete something in less time, this would be it. This would be it, to get the healing in less time, because you deserve it and we all want to heal, but guess what? There are faster routes to this. But again, it does take time. Implementation does take action and it does take the wherewithal and the trust to to move forward.

Sometimes we want to take longer. I actually had a friend in college who he was in college for 7 years and at that 7th year they were already given him a notice and a letter saying you need to finish up the semester or else you're gonna be booted out because he took more, he took longer than the normal average four years of going to college. And so where I was in a hurry to finish up college and get to work and, and get to, you know, real life, this this friend of mine, you know, took his sweet time and, you know, did 7 years instead of the average of 4 years or maybe even trying to graduate in less time. And so for me, it was always about finishing up sooner, sooner, sooner.

And so I can't stress how when we're on the wrong path, when we're seeing the signs and we don't listen, and this is hard because a lot of times that's ego, that's our stubbornness and that's assuming that what we're doing is actually correct when we're seeing all the signs that it's wrong. So let's go ahead and get into that. So 5 clues that you are on the wrong path towards healing.

The first clue is you are seeing doctors, tons of doctors, possible numerous ones, all at the same time, maybe even the best ones, quote unquote in your area. And still after many months, there are still no results, still no answers, and more than likely more hair loss. This is a travesty, this is a situation that I personally have gone through myself and this is where I was just like, okay, something needs to change.

It wasn't just me and my approach with doctors, but it was also in me asking the right questions, but then also seen within the body language that they didn't know what they were talking about, that they couldn't get me to the finish line. And that's the key here, you want the finish line. You want to get to the hair growth. You want to get past all this stuff and just go straight into hair growth. Well, many times, doctors can only go off of what they know, which could be a little or maybe even a lot, but still, you're still seeing them, you're not getting the results. Well, that's a big red flag.

I'd say another red flag and another clue that you're on the wrong path towards healing is that you find yourself getting bitter, you find yourself attacking other opportunities of hope with negativity. You see this a lot right on forums or anywhere else where a person's like: Oh, this is snake oil. Oh, this is a scam. Oh, this is this, this is that. Well, you don't know until you've tried. And the problem is, is that just kind of like the person who gets dumped all the time by maybe bad partners and bad relationships, they tend to get bitter and bitterness doesn't lead to positive results, unfortunately.

And so this is another clue that you're finding yourself getting bitter. You find yourself attacking opportunities of hope with negativity, you think everything's a lie, you think everything's a scam, you think everything is out to get you, you're thinking the worst of everybody. And you've just created this cloud of negativity around you. On top of that, you find yourself not being open minded, rather, you become more cynical and more critical and skeptical than ever. This is a huge, huge red flag because sometimes things happen and evolve little by little kind of like going through Alzheimer's or dementia.

It's not just one day to the next that all of a sudden you started losing your memory or you started losing your keys or you started losing how to get home from the supermarket or anything else. Sometimes things happen little by little and this change of behavior, this change of mood, this change of negativity and creating that spear of negativity around you can happen little by little with every attempt and maybe failed try.

That actually leads me into that next clue, that you're feeling like a failure that you're wanting to give up that you're wanting to just get a wig. Sometimes you feel stuck, you feel like you've done everything that you feel and you think that you've done everything, you've tried everything and you still have no results to show for it. That's another big clue too. You're like, what is it that I'm missing? And I'm going to tell you, like, if you are not seeing the results, if you're not getting what you want, it's because something is there that will continue to persist.

And so the thing is, the more resistance we have, the more persistence the situation And so many times we're also focused on what if that doesn't work? What if you know, X, Y, Z happens? Or what if X, Y, Z and the finish line and it's not there? And what if this and what if that? And you're thinking of the doomsday of the negative outcome before you've even started anything and that's the wrong approach. What you need to be looking at is like what's possible for you and the opportunity in front of you to get your hair back versus what if this ends miserably?

Like no one starts a new job with the negativity, like: Oh, I'm going to hate my boss, I'm going to hate my coworkers and everything's going to be awful. I'm going to be demoted, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah. No one starts a new job this way. No one starts a marriage that way either, right? No one starts school this way either thinking like school is going to be the worst and they're going to flunk and they're going to do bad and they're not going to get to college. No one starts school this way.

So in anything that you start, you need to be hopeful, you need to try and do your best. You can't go on cruise control. So that's number one, we can't go on cruise control, right? Cruise control doesn't work for jobs. It doesn't work for marriage, and it also doesn't work for your health. We cannot be on cruise control. You have to take part, you have to be involved. You have to be engaged, you have to be curious and you have to want this just like the job, just like the marriage, just like anything else in life, you have to want it to get the results you want. So you have to want the hair, truly want it. And again, look at the positive side of things and not like: Oh, this is this, this is that and start spewing all this negativity, cause again, that's not going to lead you anywhere.

And so those are kind of the things that I've been noticing on trend when I've noticed that people are on the wrong path to healing. And then on top of it, I've also seen where people's egos get in the way and they're like: Oh, but I'm a dietician. Oh, but I'm this. Oh, but I'm that. Well, that's great, but at the same time, you're still having a problem. And just because you're a doctor or just because you're in the healthcare industry, that doesn't mean you can't get alopecia, that doesn't mean you can't get cancer, that doesn't mean you can't get any sort of sickness or disease.

We're all human and we're susceptible to everything if we're not doing the things correctly. And maybe what they taught you in school is not necessarily benefiting you or actually even aiding in the progress or the results that you're looking for. And so that's also something that I've been always very open minded to question is to question a) The knowledge, question what I know and question what I can do and question what others tell me and what others say, because this is important. You want to really have the right tools, the right techniques, the right tactics in order to move forward.

If you start observing and looking at the hair loss industry and those quote unquote gimmicks like I like to call them, it's a one size fits all approach. You know, if you have alopecia areata, totalis or universalis, you're all in one bucket. If you have androgenetic female pattern baldness, you're in another bucket, if you have scarring alopecia, you're in another bucket, if you're a child with alopecia, autoimmune alopecia, you're in a different bucket.

And so why is it that we're all in different buckets? Because again, you want to put, or they want to put a blanket approach to everything, and that's not the way that this should be. That's like treating all women the same or, identifying one race, ethnicity or demographic all the same. And that's not it. We're all individual, regardless of what buckets we fill and what checkmark boxes that we may fill as well. We're all so different so this has to be a tailored approach.

Again, those are some of the clues that I have noticed. to let you know that you're on the wrong path. You know, if you're not seeing the results, if you're becoming more bitter and skeptical, if you are being more on the attack mode, because you're just so frustrated with your situation, I totally get that like heart to heart.

I get that, I understand where you are. I understand the frustration. I understand that things aren't getting better and you're tipping to the point of just exhaustion, frustration, you're upset, you're just really upset at the world in many ways. Giving up is not the way, you know, feeling like a failure is only true if you actually do give up and so keep that in mind, we have to spin this around, we have to look at the bigger opportunity here to heal because, okay, we have a problem and it will persist until you actually surrender until you actually give in until you actually say: Okay, I'm going to try this, but that's just it.

Sometimes we have to revisit the problem and take a creative approach and do something we wouldn't normally do and try something we wouldn't normally try. And yes, also surrender. In yoga, they say a lot: You have to surrender into the position. And so if any of you are, into yoga or know what pigeon pose is, it's where you are stretching half of your leg and the other leg. And this position is quite challenging for many, but it's challenging, but it's also releasing. And so sometimes that pain comes through the release. And so when you move into it and you relax, it's, actually the position becomes more and more comfortable. The healing process is actually more and more happening at a greater. depth.

And so this is some of the mindset shift that I've seen when you relate to healing, even with something so simple as yoga, because again, there is so much noise, there is so much misinformation out there and it can impair your judgment, it can impair your thinking, your decision making and even your own intuition. So, you know, what are you supposed to do? And I would say, first and foremost, cut the noise, take time in silence, recalibrate and go over everything you have done and mark it as complete and don't revisit it and be done.

I know many of you are doing the laser caps and doing red light therapy and doing PRP and doing this and doing that, but none of that works. And I know why none of that works, but you also understand why it doesn't work for you as well. Then from there, what you're going to see is you're going to see everything that you've done already and then maybe there's something that's lingering, maybe there's something that you've resisted, maybe there's something there in your list that you haven't done yet that you haven't marked as complete that you've resisted and I'd say dive into that.

Because intuition can speak, but only when we are quiet and still, and if you feel a little fear nervousness, this is actually a good sign, this is where you need to move forward and go for it. And I'll say many times when it comes to life decisions, it can feel scary. It can feel scary to buy a house, it can feel scary to commit and marry somebody, it can feel scary to move to a new state or country and take a new job that, you know, there's a lot of questions. It can feel scary to do things, but lo and behold, on the other side of that is what we are seeking.

Just like in that yoga position that I mentioned the pigeon pose. If you just go into it real quick and you're like: Oh, this is too uncomfortable. I can't sit, I can't sit in this for more than 5 minutes it's also because the nerve reaction and the reaction in our body tenses up. When you're tense, nothing's going to feel comfortable, not even you in a spa, because everything's going to be tense and locked up, right? But then once you actually relax, relax the body, relax your nerves, then you can ease into the position, which in this case, I'm using the pigeon position as an example. And guess what? Lo and behold, your joints, your knees, your legs, everything just kind of melts away like butter.

That's part of it, we need to melt away our fear. We need to melt away our resistance and move into it. And this is key, this is key for your growth, this is key for your hair, this is key for your health, this is key for that next step. I know sometimes it feels daunting. And I know sometimes it's a little nerve wracking. But I'm telling you, I wouldn't be here if I hadn't done it myself. If I hadn't gone through those same techniques to move past the fear, to move past the what if to move past the failure, because that's what it is. When you keep trying different things and it doesn't work, we have to evaluate like, why is it not working? Is it us? Is it the actual gimmick? Maybe Right? What is it? What is it that's holding us back?

And again, many times we have this old mindset of thinking that doctors are the end all be all or thinking that this one thing is the end all be all. And many times it's not just the medication. It's not just the actual thing. A lot of times it's us. It's us as well, right? And so you can apply this into anything, but for you to do better and not just get the job, but to get that promotion, there's more effort on your part, right? You have to be amazing A+ + employee for you to get that promotion. You have to show that you're capable of it, right?

And in the same vein, it's not just about doing X, Y, and Z for your hair, but it's also about that next step, it's also about putting in more effort. Because when you see and do and have, you'll get the results that you want. Many times that's what's, what's lingering here, we're not putting in the effort, we're not going all in, as I mentioned in my last podcast from last week. And, and so these are some clues that I wanted to share with you because there's ways to create a positive spin.

And again, I understand your frustration, I understand where you're coming from. I understand that you're confused and bewildered and more than likely just not understanding how to get through this. And I'm telling you, there is an easy route. I'm telling you it is possible and the Hair N' Heal program is that solution. And it's been my solution for me for more than 9 years. I still follow that program wholeheartedly and so have the thousands of clients in over 66 countries.

If you have doubts, if you have any intuitive feelings that potentially you're on the wrong path, I'd say, come see me. Send us an email: [email protected] We're happy to help you, we're happy to put you on the right path, we're happy to see exactly what you've done and help you understand like why you haven't seen those results. Cause again, many times people want to hit the surface of things. Many times people are just like that. They think it's hair loss and they're looking at the scalp. Well, that's just surface level. You got to look, you know, on a deeper level. It's mind, body, spirit. It really is. Because just with certain tweaks and certain changes, boom, you get to see so much hair growth, or you get to see the hair shedding a lot less.

And so again, I wanted to congratulate all the moms who were on the call this past week. I love hearing about all your children, I love seeing them on the zoom calls when they're there and congrats and kudos, because just like how moms do everything and do so much really. Not to discredit fathers, they do a lot as well, but what I've seen with my clients is that when moms are doing the program for their children, these moms are vigilant, they are so tenacious.

It's a beautiful relationship in terms of me and the moms, but then also the moms with the children and how this all comes full circle with the family. It really is a beautiful synergy that happens so that of course the little one can see healing and the little one can be your 19 year old son or daughter, it could be your 21 year old son or daughter, but it could also be your 5 year old, your 2 year old, your 10 year old, your 15 year old. And I know as parents, your children will always be your children.

And so understand that the support is there, the healing is there and the true path is there too for you. You just got to go and grab it. I hope this helps, and I hope this helps you see where potentially you may be on the wrong path, but then we can always pivot that, we can always change. That's the beauty of, of healing. We can always change and course correct to get the results that we're looking for. I look forward to speaking to you next time.

Take care. Bye bye.