Episode 125 - After 14 Years With Hair Loss and Multiple Health Concerns, She Got Her Hair Back

TRANSCRIPTION 

Erica: Hi

Johanna: Hi, how are you?

Erica: Oh, I'm doing great. You're probably like: She hasn't sent me an email in a long time, is everything alright?

Johanna: It's so refreshing to see you this way because when we had our consultation, even before you joined the program, you even had me feeling all these feelings from when I was going through my hair loss. You had your story your situation is so compelling. And not to say that everyone else's story is not compelling as well. We all have a story with hair loss, but you were so vulnerable with me from the get go, and that's the beauty of you to begin with. But tell us a little bit about what's going on right now. What wins are you seeing? And then we'll get back and circle back to your story.

Erica: So as of right now, my hair has completely gone back to normal shedding. I have absolutely no more: Oh God, I'm going to get like so emotional. It's the way it was like before I ever had any kind of issue with my auto immunity. So, I do not have any kind of, like panic or fear when I get into the shower now. I look forward to washing my hair, I look forward to massaging my scalp. That absolute terror of putting my hands through my hair, touching my scalp, watching it, doing anything to it, it's just gone.

When it stopped shedding, I was just like: Okay, you know, it's going to start again. Like I was just waiting for the day for it to rebound and it hasn't happened. Almost get a little scared sometimes like saying it out loud, but I understand now that it's not going to anymore. Like this is moving forward. I'm getting into the phase of: Okay, now I'm in the regrowth phase. So it took a really short time for all my hair to fall out, but you know, now I have to sit back and just relax, let my hair grow, just do everything that I know that I need to do. It's just the peace of mind.

I just feel like I have like a better version of myself now because I lost myself, I lost my identity, I lost my happiness and now that I know that it's fully in my control again, and now I know what to do moving forward, like, that's really what I wanted, like, peace of mind, knowing that no matter what happens to me in the future, I know exactly what I need to do to stay focused, and that's worth every single penny, because now I know these are my blind spots, this is what I really need to focus on and it's not like it's things that I have, what wasn't aware of. I just didn't understand how important they were and how, for me in particular, my blind spots are, may not be a blind spot for somebody else, but for me, it might be a much bigger issue that I have to, you know, stay focused on and keep control with.

So that peace of mind, like was able to calm me down right away once I was able to figure it out. So, you know, it was a hard transition at first. I know you felt my anxiety and it was just, you know, releasing the old and embracing the new. At one point I was just like: Just shut up, like, just listen to your body and just let it go. And. I'm seeing like the fruits of my labor now and it's life changing. It really, truly is, I don't have that panic anymore. Yeah, I really, really don't. And you know, I've been panicking about my hair since all my autoimmune issues started in 2011, so you're talking, I'm 45 now. It's been what, like 14 years of this.

I really feel like moving forward, I have the tools now, you know, and that's what's worth every single penny. It's just having the knowledge and saying: I am in complete control of this now. Now I know my triggers, now I know what I need to work on, now I know specifically what works and doesn't work for me and there are things that I'm like: Okay, it is what it is but I'm going to get my hair and my hair is growing. It's really crazy, it's mind blowing, I don't know. I could go on forever, like we could talk for hours. But you know, now that I'm on like the other end of it and I and I went a lot slower than other people like you were sending out: Oh, we came I'm like, I'm still on like week 4, you know, but that's beauty of the program, like you go at your own pace and there were certain things I needed to do slower.

That's what's so beautiful about the program is that it didn't make me feel like I was rushed, you know, I'm still have access to the program for a while and I'm still doing some introductory things and it's fine, like it works like, but it was those first 2-3 weeks that I really appreciated just the positive reinforcement and just, you know, being my biggest cheerleader and saying: This is a change, but just embrace it and know that it's going to be okay. That's what was really important to me, knowing that I was doing something that I've never done before, and I just needed someone who could just say to me, just believe in it.

And I did, I always believed in you, I always knew, even if I was like, emailing you at like, 2 in the morning, but like, I always knew that you were going to help me. I have like that inner sense and so I couldn't be happier. I just, I have my, my peace of mind back and everyone notices it. I don't like go out and like fly up to everybody. So many of my coworkers and my friends have noticed the difference in me and it's because I feel like I finally have this piece of the puzzle that many doctors and physicians and nutritionists, I've not been able to help me for years.

Johanna: Yeah, and I felt your pain, I felt your pain and I knew I could help and I knew this was a a huge possibility for you just like it is for everyone. I guess for a bigger picture understanding. Currently, what week are you in in the program?

Erica: I don't know, I don't know, am I going to get in trouble for this? But so like, I'm a teacher, right? Like the first day that I had the program, I'm like printing everything out. I like did everything, like I didn't do it week by week, I jumped here and there.

I was just so happy to start that I think that was my problem, I was so eager. I wanted to do so much so quickly because I was like: Oh my God, this is like I want my hair as soon as possible. And I think my advice to people who moving forward, I would say do it, but don't overwhelm yourself. It's a lot of information and the way that you time it is perfectly. I wish that I would have maybe done a little less, you know, because like I would do too much and then I would stop.

And I think it was really the reintroduction and putting things in and out. That's what took the longest and is still taking the longest for me. But like I said, it's like such peace of mind because now I know definitely not doing this, not going near that, not even touching that, this is a maybe, this is a sometimes. That is something that I know I always needed, but never really got from anyone. And now I'm like: Well, this is so huge for me. So technically I think I'm still, I finished most of the weeks, but I'm still with the reintroduction back in, is where I'm like lying on, yeah.

Johanna: How soon did you start to see progress? In any or in any area of your health, and I say this because the listeners don't know that it wasn't just hair loss that was affecting you, you had multiple, layers of health concerns not just hair loss.

Erica: Yeah, so I had just a quick review. I've had like every digestion in the book, you know, every kind of symptoms, so I've had SIBO in the past, but that's where I store all of my negative and like emotional toxicity and all my feelings and so, you know, I work on that. I had sleep issues adrenal issues, I had a nervous eye, I'm working on a dysregulated nervous system, I've had bouts of like fibromyalgia and migraines, hair loss. I mean, I've had so much, I've had skin pigmentation, discoloration, thyroid issues. So much, just so much. I mean, they all piggyback on one another, unfortunately.

So the first thing I noticed it was really my digestion. My digestion was going up and down, but I was noticing just with the ease of it and the bloating like I said, there were certain things I had to figure out that worked and didn't work for me, but for the most part I was eating in a way that I never thought could possibly heal me, because I've worked with so many people, I've said: Try this, try this, this, and that. So, for people that don't know, I had a regular standard American diet, and then in all my health crisis, did something completely different, I went raw vegan for like 6 years and kind of worked for me, but in the end it didn't.

And so I came into this program with a very different mindset about food and what's healthy and what's not. And so I learned a lot about what wasn't right for me at that time, and it may not be right for me in the future. So it was a huge wake up call because I'm like: I know everything, like, this is great for me, like, it doesn't matter, it's from the earth and it's like, I pull it from a tree and it's delicious. But like, I guess I got into that mentality that this is the only route. It was a wake up call for me to understand that

healing comes in all different ways, shapes, sizes, forms. And once it's individualized, it kind of shook my core of what I believe in a good way, but there was some resistance there, there was, I was a little nervous, but now I'm like: Okay, this is what works for me, this is what works for what I have.

And so the digestion within 2 weeks, I really started noticing that the hair was in stages. It wasn't like it just stopped one day within 2 weeks. It was down by 50%. And then once I figured out the last few, like blind spots, it was just done, like, it was like the light went off and I was like: Oh my God. I don't have like white patches anymore, my sleep is fantastic. I'm sleeping throughout the night. I used to wake up 6-7 times in a night and now I wake up once, which is huge and I'm trying to get it down to zero, but once is huge for me. Migraines, I used to get high migraines right before my cycle, they're gone. I haven't had a migraine in the 3 cycles that I've been doing the program, which is crazy to me. I feel like they're definitely much more regular. I know exactly when they're coming, I feel more grounded, I'm not having as much like anxiety or like that heart palpitation.

I feel like my hormones are balancing out, I had a lot of hormonal stuff because they all piggyback on each other. So I feel like that is definitely much more consistent and just clarity. I just feel more at peace. But like symptoms wise, it was slow. Like the digestion was first and then the sleeping and the anxiety slowly subsided and then the hair was like: I started this for my hair, but the hair was like the icing on the cake. I didn't realize that all these other things were going to get so much better. It wasn't just my hair and also things that I never really focused on. It was done in such an easy, stress free way that I'm: This is something I could always do, you know, work on and keep going. But yeah, I mean, a lot of it, like, I'm just trying to think because it's, there's just so much of it, joint pain gone, I had like joint pain in my shoulder for, I'm not even exaggerating, like 4 years, didn't know what was happening and it's gone, it's gone. Like, I don't know what happened to it, it's just like disappeared and I'm like: My shoulder doesn't hurt when I do this. Like I was always, you know, working on this side.

My vision, I feel like even like my dry eyes are much better, it's just like weird. Like a really, really good way, but it's like, you know, I'll just notice that while I'm teaching one day where it's like, I don't have to take all these eye drops and wow, why is that? Okay. Just going to keep doing what I'm doing, you know? 15 years of it just being an absolute nightmare, but now I see how they, like, work together. I noticed that before the hair.

Johanna: And just to clarify, so within 2 weeks you said the shedding decreased by 50%, correct?

Erica: Oh yeah. Oh, so my hair, I mean, I'm one of those people that are so annoying. I didn't take, you know, before is that the shedding, but I mean, my hair was shedding for consistently 2 years. And within the first 2 weeks, it's it was shedding 50% less. So I was like: Wow, it was still shedding, but it was shedding significantly less that I noticed it in the drain. And this is me when I get up in the morning and like I brush my hair in the morning, I have maybe like 10, 15 hairs and then I'll take a shower and like, it literally is like this tiny amount of hair.

And then when I comb my hair, I'm definitely shedding less than a hundred hairs a day now, which is mind blowing to me, and it doesn't matter what my period is, it doesn't matter my cycle because, you know, I was like that crazy person. I'm like, all right, I'm ovulating. I'm definitely going to shed more today, like, it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter if there's a full moon, it doesn't matter. Like I had all these theories, like: Oh, my crystals weren't clean or I didn't do the longer meditation today. I'm like: it doesn't matter. It's and that's like, okay, so bad, so bad. But I mean, a lot of people are going to relate to this like you just try and rationalize it and make yourself feel better when you're in it.

And, you know, I put so much on this, this, this emphasis on this and it wasn't, you know, it was things that I had to really focus on and and look at that I didn't really pay attention to, you know but yeah, so within 2 weeks it was down by 50% and then as of right now, I'm like two weeks behind, so i'm like i'm really in like week 6 week 7 my hair is back to normal and shedding so I'm under the 8th week I guess deadline or like the 8th week window. So, I mean, within under 8 weeks, my hair has completely stopped overshedding.

Johanna: And in terms of what type of hair loss you had, when were you diagnosed or if you were ever diagnosed?

Erica: So I was diagnosed. I was losing my hair at 31 and then around 36, 37, I went to a trichologist in New York city and he told me that it looked like androgenetic alopecia, which I didn't understand at the time because like, I felt like my hair was like thinning out, but it wasn't really thinning, like on top, it was like all over. And so I did the whole route of the masks and all that stuff and I did the lighting and everything. And then I went on some meds for my. thyroid and everything balanced out, but it was never the same. It was never the same. And then I started to get my second huge shed 3 years ago.

And then I went to a different trichologist and he said: Oh, well you have telogen effluvium. So I said: Okay, but I was also told that I have androgenetic alopecia and he's like: Oh yeah, you have that too and I was like, okay, so now I have 2 alopecias, like what is going on? But this last shed was the most significant I've ever had. I mean, I lost over 50% of my hair, which someone, if they see this are not going to realize, but, you know, I have a little powder in and I keep my hair up, but I did shed more than 50 of it and I saw a lot of it like on the top and the sides like really bad.

But that's where I'm seeing like all my hair growth, like I had a part, and it was just getting whiter and it was just all over. It was, you know, I kind of looked like a really cute Gollum from like Lord of the Rings I want to say, like, I was like a cute version of him, but it was really crazy. And then again, once I started this program, like now, like when I do like a pull test or anything, like no hairs coming out and a lot of my hair, like you said in one of your videos, when you feel that itch, I was terrified, I thought I had some kind of like contact dermatitis, I'm like: Oh God, what's happening? Like, it's like, why is my head itchy? And then I noticed my scalp wasn't, it wasn't irritated. It didn't have flakes, it was my hair growing back cause I'm like, why is it so itchy here? Why is it so itchy here? I'm like: Oh my God, it's bad, like it was hair. So those were the 2 types of alopecia that I was diagnosed with.

Johanna: So your autoimmune disease is not alopecia areata totalis or universalis, it's a different autoimmune disease and even then, so any markers with that autoimmune disease, have they gone down? Have they lowered? Have they improved?

Erica: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I work with a functional medicine doctor and I just had some blood work done and she's just like: Yeah, your markers are down. She's like: You're doing like really well and I'm like: Okay, she's like: What are you doing? And I was like: You know what I'm doing, I'm working with an angel and she's like, mm hmm, but she's like very supportive and she knows me and she knows that like I'm not the kind of patient that like sticks into like one box. I just feel like at peace, you know, and to know that this worked and I knew that it was going to it was just like, you know, all these other clients of your say, you just kind of have to like take the leap.

But the telogen effluvium, when I was diagnosed with that, they just kept telling me: Oh, it'll stop, it'll stop, it'll stop. It never stopped. It just kept going and going, you know? And so that, and then on top of the other alopecia they told me I had I was like: Okay, so now I have 2 of these. Like, is another one going to like piggyback on top, but. That's what I was told, even though I kind of like, didn't believe them. I was like: No, I don't believe this. I don't believe I have it.

Johanna: So how's everything with everything else outside your world. Because the thing is, it's like we have hair loss and that's like an internal, almost secret burden we all carry, but then at work, as you said, you know, coworkers notice a change, your boyfriend, I'm sure notices a change, your family, your friends, maybe even your neighbors. What have people been noticing and telling you?

Erica: It's funny, but a lot of them, so they're noticing my demeanor. They saw such a change in me because, you know, I'm an art teacher, I teach 600 kids a week and so I'm a very animated, you can tell from this video, like very like animated and happy and, you know, very Italian and loud. That part of me like died, I didn't feel like myself. I've always had this long, beautiful, gorgeous hair and it just, I took it for granted.

And so my demeanor changed, I became very distant, I became very quiet, I became just very going with the motions. So when I really started to work on myself and really calm myself and say like, you know what, this is just as, as important as what, you know, goes in here or what I feel here, it's, it's all like a working system once I really started working on that and focusing on that as well, which I have been for a while and doing meditations and just calming myself, I think everyone started to notice that. The old me came back, but it was a more like confident, calm, relaxed. It wasn't someone who was like pretending to be happy or calm.

You know, something frazzles me now, I'm kind of not like a dog that like jumps and like starts going crazy. I'm kind of like a lion, I sit back and I'm like: Okay, I'm going to assess the situation before I lose it, you know? And a lot of the times I don't even lose it, I just say, it's not even worth it and my mental thing in my head is: It's not worth my hair, it's not worth my hair, you know? I think that's what the biggest notice that they changed in me, that weight, that heaviness, that darkness that I've been feeling for so long about my appearance and my scalp and God, like the, am I going to go bald? Am I going to have to get a wig? Is like, this is going to happen? That's just gone.

There's no amount of money that I would ever, like, I'll pay a million dollars to have that go away, and it did. Like, I really, truly don't, like, have that deep seated fear in my body anymore, it's like I'm releasing it. That was connected with some other things, so I think when my co workers noticed that, that I just kind of just know, took all of that, worked on it and kind of said: Okay, I'm done with this now, I can let this go. But it's an ongoing thing. You have to work on it. I think that's the biggest thing they notice and they do notice the hair, they're like: Wow, your hair looks like really curly, your hair's curly. I'm like, it is curly.

And so, you know, I haven't blow dried it or I'm letting it get air dry and I just scrunch it up, but they just, they, I think they see that dark cloud being lifted from me. You know, they're starting to see a more authentic me to come out and a calmer version of myself, but in like a really beautiful way. I'll always be who I am, but it's not like that.

Johanna: It's an upgraded version, you know, it's a 2.0. It reminds me a lot of when I hear you, I think of my own, it's, it's hard not to separate the two. I always think of myself and I see myself in my clients as well, right? Cause I've already been through that and come to the other side. But you are always you for sure, and I am always me, but it's definitely a better version, it's an upgraded version. It's like, you know, the latest iPhone versus the first one. It's got so many more gadgets and abilities and capabilities and storage and space and like, you know what I mean? Mental capacity and all these other things that the first version doesn't have. I mean, who doesn't want to be upgraded? I'll take that any day.

Erica: Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I do feel like a better version of myself. And so, you know, now I know it's like everything this point, like moving forward, like it's all good, like everything that I manifest and everything that I meditate on every night, like, it's just becoming more and more clear to me and it's not a fantasy anymore. It's like my reality is actually coming into play. So, it's just such a deep sense of peace. I mean, it's just so much more than hair. I mean, hair is the reason that drove me to contact you, but I mean, that's just the icing on the cake like I said, of what I received from this program.

I received my sanity and my peace of mind back, you know, and anyone who loses hair knows how. devastating that is you lose yourself, you lose your identity, you lose your will to be happy, you isolate yourself, you just change into just like a fraction of who you are. It robbed me so much, hair loss robbed me of so many joyful moments in my life

that I look back on and I get just angry and sad because it's like: Oh, I should have just been able to push through it. But it's hard, it's hard as a woman too. I can't speak because I'm not a man, but as a woman, like we put so much of our identity in our hair and I've been told my whole life, how beautiful my hair was.

And so when those compliments stopped and the only hairstyle I could do was put it up in a bun. Why do you always do your hair in a bun, Mrs? It's like: Oh, I'm just lazy. It's crushing, it's devastating because you feel like that part of you is just gone. But now being on the tail end of the program, that's why I would say to myself, it's, I don't know if this will help anyone, but maybe all of that old hair needed to fall out because the new and improved me improved me can't carry that old hair with her, like the hair that's growing in now is the me that I fought really hard for to work and to get.

I really love myself now and I really appreciate myself and I see how strong I am and If it means that I had to lose all my hair to become the woman that is speaking to you right now, I would do it all over again because the person I am now is like so much better and so much empathy, has so much more empathy and so much work and passion. So strong and I love myself. Like, if I can love myself through all of that, and have my hair just leave me, then, like, leave me, like, I can do it. I just feel like the hair that's gonna grow back on my hair, my head now, is gonna be the hair that, like, was always meant to be there, you know, because the old hair just held so much pain and hurt and frustration and sadness and that's not who I am you know?

So maybe it was like this like shedding of like all this negativity and all this pain and so if that helps anyone, you know was thinking about doing the program like maybe you have to go through that, maybe you have to, you know, become that caterpillar and get into your little cocoon and shed all of that in order to come out as the butterfly. You just might need a little guidance to do that, you might need a little guidance, I know I needed it. But you know, like I said, if I had to turn back time and, and do it all over again, I would because I kind of really love myself now and I love myself even without hair. So I think that's like a huge thing, you know?

Johanna: 100% I understand that. What would you say to anyone who's on the fence?

Erica: Oh God, please just do it. Like, it's just, don't be that person. Like I told you from the first time I spoke to you, like I always felt that you were going to help me. Like there was just something energetically that I felt with you. Don't be on the fence for it. Like, this is something I'm one of those cliche people that it's like: Oh, I really wish I would have found you like a year ago. I really wish I would have found you like 2 years ago, cause I would have saved myself a lot of time and a lot of tears and a lot of party and a lot of money, a lot of money.

I mean, it's just so ridiculous. I mean, the program, the way you set it up, how easy it is to follow, how the communication is fantastic between you and everyone that you work with, and just how it's set up and just your demeanor and how you treat people and how you talk to people. It's, I mean, that to me was worth every single penny, Johanna like you really went above and beyond to make me feel like this was gonna be okay. Like I remember you told me one mindset: You gotta be like an astronaut, she's gonna go into space and this is what you're gonna do. And I remember just being like: damn right! I'm an astronaut! I'm gonna do it! Like, I was disturbed and crying, and I was bloated, but I was like, I'm gonna be a damn astronaut! If she could have a baby and her hair doesn't fall out, then damn it, that's gonna be me.

I just needed that and I feel like so many people just need that extra little, like, boost, that extra little confidence, like push. And I feel like, especially in today, with so many, like, physicians and doctors, and you don't get that anymore, you just get here, just do this, you'll be fine. And like, there's so much more to this program than just getting your hair back or your just the knowledge of it and the peace of mind like it's just so encompassing and I just hope that whoever's like on the fence like you can call me talk me out. Yeah, like I'll talk your ear off. Like I'm not going to tell you like what's going to work for you because everybody's different, but like, yeah, don't ever second guess that this program isn't going to work for you, cause it does.

I was one of those people that I gave complete faith in you, but there was a small part of me that was like: I don't know if this is going to work, like, I don't, I'm too far gone. It worked, it worked. I was one of those people, I listened to all the other interviews, I listened to all the podcasts you always do and I'm like, I'm that person, it's the same thing. Like, if we're all saying the same thing, then obviously something is really working, you know? So, if anyone's on the fence, please just really understand that time is precious and your time is worth it and you are worth it and there is a way to do this properly for the rest of your life. It's not like you do this and then 6 months later your hair's gonna grow back, fall out. So just do it.

Like figure out how to do it, just do it, you know, ask a lot of questions, be a pain in the butt, but like, just do it knowing that for 14 years I've struggled with this and in a matter of 8 weeks, my hair stopped shedding. That is worth every single penny, but also have the peace of mind knowing that I have the tools now. I'm not going to worry about it anymore, like I have the tools and every day I get stronger and more knowledgeable knowing. That's priceless. That is priceless for someone who has any kind of hair loss, you know, I just wished I would have found you sooner to be honest. I really do, I really wish I could have found you a year or 2 ago. But everything happens for a reason and everything in due time and so I'm just happy that I did discover you and I did find you and you came into my path and I'm eternally grateful for that. I really, really am.

Johanna: And I'm grateful for you. I love all my clients and I remember each one and not just beyond the intake form, beyond the coaching calls, but also the consult calls like you and I, and. It was like immediate, you know, energy, immediate connection and you're yeah, I'll always remember you for sure. I definitely want to keep in touch, I definitely want to see your progress. Yes, you're already seeing hair growth, so I'm ecstatic for you. I'm so ecstatic to also see this upgraded version that I talk about where you do have peace of mind, you do have control, you are empowered and you're just like, you're a whole new person in so many ways.

This is why I love having these one on ones, but I also love the coaching calls because I also see how people start because everyone starts very similarly, you know, in a very hopeful, not so hopeful, you know, unhappy, you know, distressed situation and I love being able to see it turn around in just a couple of weeks. And then now, you know, I see, I go to a coaching call and everyone's like smiling and I love it, everyone's smiling and everyone is just like...

This is what life should be, it should be easy because we should be enjoying our other things in life instead of worrying about things that we can take control of. This was such a big situation and I'm sorry, you've had to go through so much ups and downs in 14 years. For me, it was 4 years, but 14 years is a long time and granted there's people in the program who've been on it for 30 years, 40 years. I'm just ecstatic that they're taking the step forward and choosing them and choosing themselves and choosing this self love, this self care in order for them to heal and, and be done with it because who knows, we're hopefully going to live beyond 90 years old and still have all of our hair and the healthiest possible and thrive. I mean, that's my goal.

Erica: I know. Hopefully 85, if I could do 85.

Johanna: 85-90, it's all good, it's all good. Any last parting words that you'd like to share?

Erica: I'm just very grateful. I just, whoever hair loss is devastating, it takes its toll and as women and anyone who has hair loss, I think it's great to have a community and have people like you that support us and love us and go above and beyond to try and help us. And I think anyone who has hair loss, I hope that they know that even though it is devastating, your hair doesn't defy who you are. You really always need to love yourself and really take care of yourself and do put yourself as a priority. I think especially as women we're, you know, born to be caregivers and take care of everyone.

And, you know, you always say like: You got to put on the mask before you save anybody else. And I think that we get into this very awful habit as females that we are always constantly having to look after and take care of everybody else and I think for myself, advocating for myself, standing up for myself, taking care of myself is not being selfish or, you know, narcissistic. It's my right, it's my right to be healthy and to be happy and to be loved and to love myself. I feel the greatest love you could possibly ever give is the love that you have within yourself.

I just hope that anyone who's out there who is really struggling with this issue that I've been struggling with, that they know that they are worth it, their life is worth it, their hair is worth it, their sanity is worth it and I hope that they advocate for themselves because they are responsible for their lives. It's them who has to advocate and put yourself first once, put yourself first once. You deserve it, you deserve to be happy and to be loved and to be healthy and I don't think enough people do that. It's a really bad program that

we all have in our heads. And I just really hope that everyone takes care of themselves the way that they are supposed to be.

Johanna: Amen. Amen.